The headache is still with me, but bearable. I’m coping. Thankfully! 🙂
I LOVE this sober space which I’m occupying. Everything about it, including my body’s discomfort, feels right. Not necessarily easy though. I remain committed and focused. I am loving it.
I feel like one of those surfers who have waited a lifetime for the perfect wave to arrive, and now that it is here I do not want it to end. I do not want to fall off it.
I spur myself on.
Today I remind myself of an important truth. (Truths can be like small children. They can wander off. We need to keep hold of their hand and keep them close. In the case of children, it is for their sake, but where truths are concerned, it is 100% for our sakes)
Truth: I am not giving up anything good. Instead, I am ushering out many many bad things (unwelcome guests who should have gone home a long time ago!). I am welcoming the arrival of a long list of good things (My real friends, who are here to make me smile and laugh and live happy and fulfilled).
5 days ago I made a list of + and – reasons for drinking alcohol. I honestly struggled to find a ‘+’ item (They were tenuous at best)
Here’s my list of ‘-‘ items. These are the things I am saying goodbye to.
Headaches (ok! They’re not quite gone yet 🙂)
Liver failure.
Pancreatic cancer.
Massive dents to my bank balance (££££££££££££).
Failing to look after my relationships.
Brain chemistry changes.
Wasted time.
Zero reading.
Existing instead of living.
Weight gain.
Hangovers.
Sleep deprivation.
Slavery.
Hideous repeating cycle.
Indigestion.
Impeding my gym training and fitness.
Endless chatter and negotiation in my head.
Early death.
Talking shite / Speaking inappropriately in public (Humiliation and regret.)
High cholesterol.
Colon problems.
Diarrhoea (every day) Oh! Too much information! No, it’s not! let’s have the truth out there.
Feelings of fear, betrayal and failure.
The list goes on….
NOTE: On the other hand, however, what I am ushering ‘IN’, is the opposite or absence of all the above (with the possible exception of talking shite which might only be diminished LOL)
I am grateful. I am hopeful. I am celebrating (DAY 5!!!!!)
TOP TIP for today:
Keep the truth near. Ignore the lying voice of alcohol in my head which is growing weaker by the moment and whose days are numbered.